The Foibles of Self-exploration

“Self-exploration is my favorite hobby,” my new friend said. And I nodded vigorously, glad to have found a kindred spirit.  In the past year, though, I’ve been trying to make some life decisions and finding that all of this personal study has left me a bit confused.

Is it the Leo in me that makes me so driven or my Type A personality?

Do I brim with new ideas because I’m a Creative or because my primary Strength is ideation?

Do I throw myself into those projects because I’m a Risk Taker or because my Enneagram is 7?

Do I crave new information because I’m Generation X or because I’m a Lifelong Learner?

Am I hyper aware because I’m an Intuitive or because I’m a Highly Sensitive Person?

Do I continue to do the things I don’t want to do out of Catholic Guilt or Firstborn Responsibility?

Are these irrational fears hangovers from my Past Lives or unresolved Trauma from my childhood?

Must I always go my own way because of my Entrepreneurial Spirit or my Rugged Western Individualism?

Do people see real value in my ideas or are they caught up in my Tiger form of communication or my “Rebellion” Fascination Trigger?

Do I long to be around people because I’m an Extrovert or because my Love Language is quality time?

Is it the Democrat or the Mother in me that wants to save the world?

How then do I reconcile my liberal politics with my conservative nature?

Do I manage so many things well because I’m an ENFJ or because I’m a Female?

And to whom should I turn for guidance?  Should I listen to my horoscope or watch for signs from my spirit guides?

Should I meditate or pray?

Do I need more vigorous exercise or more quiet walks in the woods?

If I can’t go more than 24 hours without chocolate, does that prove I have an addictive personality?

Should I drink that glass of wine to loosen me up or avoid it to keep me from saying too much?

Should I read another book on personality types or give it a rest? Oh, who am I kidding?  If a new study came out that linked personality to hair color, I’d read it. Or have they done that already? I’m a brunette . . .